How to Use Someone Like an Object (Without Being an Asshole)

So, You Want to Turn a Person into Furniture. Let’s Talk About It.

There’s a fine, delicious line between power play and being a jerk.

Objectification kink walks that line in heels. It’s about control, precision, and the eroticism of using a body like a tool — a chair, a vessel, a living prop — while still respecting the soul inside it.

If that sounds contradictory, that’s because it is. Objectification is the kink of paradox:You’re dehumanizing someone in order to give them the most human experience possible — being seen, wanted, and trusted at their most vulnerable.

How to Use Someone Like an Object (Without Being an Asshole)

But make no mistake — if you don’t know how to handle that paradox, you’ll end up looking less like a Dom(me) and more like a self-absorbed amateur.

So here’s how to do it right.

1. Start With Power, Not Cruelty

The goal of objectification play isn’t to humiliate for your ego. It’s to create an experience that hits both players on a psychological and erotic level.

The submissive wants to feel like an object — used, reduced, owned — but they also want to feel safe.That safety comes from you. Your tone, your boundaries, your control.

Being dominant doesn’t mean being harsh. It means being decisive.

Domination isn’t about shouting orders. It’s about creating gravity — and watching someone willingly orbit around it.

2. The Power of Ritual: Switching the Scene On

Before you start treating someone like your ashtray or coffee table, you need to mark the moment the fantasy begins.

Rituals matter in kink because they separate the scene from real life.It could be:

• A collar or leash clasped into place.

• A verbal command (“You’re mine now.”)

• A symbolic gesture — blindfolding, kneeling, silence.

That’s the mental doorway.

You both step through it knowing that everything that happens inside is chosen.

That’s what makes it powerful — and safe.

3. Choose Your Object Wisely (and Creatively)

Objectification doesn’t always mean degradation. It’s about transformation.

Think beyond clichés. Sure, they can be a footstool, but they can also be:

• A platter — to serve food or drink from.

• A mirror — kneeling still while you get ready.

• A pedestal — for your shoes, your jewelry, your glass.

• A canvas — for your hands, your spit, your lipstick.

The hotter you make the context, the less it’s about cruelty and the more it’s about power and imagination.

You’re building a world where their surrender has meaning.

4. Control the Energy, Not the Person

The best Dommes and Doms don’t control through force. They control through focus.

Your job isn’t to “break” the submissive. It’s to hold them so completely that they willingly dissolve.That takes attunement — noticing their breath, their body language, their micro-reactions.

You can tell someone to “stay still” — but the real art is making them want to.To hold their breath for you. To freeze for your gaze.That’s dominance. That’s the spell.

Don’t confuse obedience with connection. Real power comes from both.

5. Play With Words Like a Weapon

Objectification thrives on language.Every word you use shapes how they feel about their submission.

Some examples to test:

• “You’re furniture now.”

• “No thoughts, no feelings. Just function.”

• “You exist to hold this space for me.”

• “Quiet. Pretty things don’t speak.”

Notice how tone shifts meaning.

Said cruelly, those words can crush.Said with poise, they become scripture.

Language in domination is like pressure — too much and it breaks; just enough and it bends beautifully.

6. Don’t Forget the Aftercare

Objectification is intense. Even when it looks calm from the outside, it’s emotional warfare inside.When it ends, it needs to end gently.

Aftercare isn’t optional — it’s the exhale after the scene.Undo the ritual. Reaffirm the person beneath the object.Touch them, hydrate them, talk.

Ask:

• “How did that feel?”

• “What did you need more or less of?”

• “What stayed with you?”

Aftercare is where you show that you saw them all along — that their objecthood was performance, not punishment.

7. The Ethics of Fantasy: How to Keep It Hot (and Humane)

There’s no “right” way to play objectification. But there is a wrong way — and it usually starts with forgetting it’s a collaboration.

The submissive might be the object, but they’re also your co-director.

You build the fantasy together — through consent, communication, and ongoing check-ins.

That’s how you make degradation feel safe enough to be freeing.

And here’s the secret most Dominants don’t admit:If you do it right, you’ll get addicted to the reverence in it.The quiet power of being trusted enough to unmake someone — and then bring them back whole.

The Object Is Sacred

The submissive isn’t an accessory.They’re a living altar for your control.When you use them like an object, you’re not erasing their humanity — you’re amplifying it.

You’re saying: “I see your surrender. I see your stillness. I see the courage it takes to be nothing for me.”

That’s not cruelty. That’s art.

And only the best Dominants know how to make it feel that way.