It's such a taboo topic, and at the same time we are all curious about it, aren't we? When it comes to sex, many men secretly (or not-so-secretly) worry about lasting long enough to satisfy their partner, or to last enough to enjoy the beautiful moment. If you’ve ever found yourself thinking, Is it already over? You’re not alone. Premature ejaculation affects an estimated 30-40% of men at some point in their lives, and even those who don’t struggle with it often want to improve their endurance. The good news are, that lasting longer in bed isn’t just a fantasy—it’s a skill you can build up, let's look at how!
Why Do Some Men Struggle with Lasting Long in Bed?
Before diving into solutions, let’s quickly unpack the why behind the issue. Premature ejaculation and short-lasting stamina can be caused by several factors:
Performance anxiety – Overthinking kills pleasure. If you're stuck in your head, your body follows suit.
Over-sensitivity – Some men experience heightened nerve sensitivity, making it harder to control arousal.
Hormonal imbalances – Low serotonin levels have been linked to quicker ejaculation.
Lack of control over arousal – Many men never learn to regulate their excitement.
Masturbation habits – Rushing through solo sessions can train your body to climax quickly.
The first step to lasting longer? Understanding that this is totally normal—and completely fixable. And that there are so many different ways to have sex, and feel pleasure.
Proven Techniques to Last Longer in Bed
Now, let’s get to the good stuff. Here are practical, research-backed methods to help you build stamina and confidence in the bedroom:
1. The Start-Stop Technique
Think of this as training for endurance. When you’re close to climax, stop all stimulation, breathe deeply, and let your arousal subside before resuming. Repeat as needed. Over time, this helps you gain more control over your orgasm.
2. The Squeeze Method
When you feel yourself approaching the point of no return, gently squeeze the base of your penis for a few seconds. This decreases blood flow slightly, reducing sensitivity and delaying ejaculation.
3. Kegel Exercises for Sexual Stamina
Yes, men have pelvic floor muscles too, and strengthening them can help you last longer. Try this: next time you urinate, stop mid-stream. The muscles you engage? Those are your pelvic floor muscles. Strengthen them by squeezing for 5-10 seconds multiple times a day.
4. Slow Down and Breathe
Fast and frantic movements lead to quick finishes. Slowing down your thrusts and syncing your breath with your movements can extend the experience significantly. Try deep belly breathing—inhale slowly through your nose, exhale through your mouth—to stay relaxed and in control.
5. Change Up the Sensations
Switch positions, pace, and intensity. If one move gets you too close to the edge, shift to something slower and more controlled. Certain positions, like spooning or missionary with minimal hip movement, can help prolong the session.
6. Use Desensitizing Products (If Needed)
Lidocaine-based sprays or creams can slightly reduce sensitivity, allowing you to last longer. However, moderation is key—you don’t want to eliminate sensation completely.
7. Edging During Masturbation
If you usually finish in under two minutes when masturbating, your body is conditioned to quick releases. Train yourself by edging—bringing yourself close to orgasm, stopping, and repeating multiple times before allowing climax.
8. Consider Supplements and Diet Adjustments
Some supplements may help improve stamina, including:
L-arginine – Boosts blood flow and erectile function.
Zinc – Supports testosterone production.
Maca root – Known to enhance libido and endurance.
The Psychological Game: Overcoming Performance Anxiety
For many men, the biggest roadblock isn’t physical—it’s mental. Performance anxiety triggers the fight-or-flight response, making it even harder to control ejaculation. Here’s how to shift your mindset:
Reframe the experience – Instead of focusing on "not finishing too soon," focus on pleasure and connection.
Communicate with your partner – Pressure to perform often melts away when you talk openly about your concerns.
Use mindfulness techniques – Practices like meditation can help you stay present rather than anxious.
Final Thoughts: Practice Makes Perfect
Just like hitting the gym, lasting longer in bed takes consistent effort. The more you practice these techniques, the more control you’ll develop. So next time you’re about to get intimate, remember: slow down, breathe, and focus on the journey—not just the destination.