Quiz: What's Your Sexuality Actually?

Amanda Sandström Beijer
3 days ago
6 min read

Ready to dig deeper into your actuall sexuality? This isn't your typical "Am I Gay?" quiz with basic yes/no questions. We're diving into the messy, beautiful complexity of human attraction with a quiz that actually gets it. From Berlin's underground scene to your bedroom fantasies, we'll explore the spectrum of desire that makes you you.

Sexuality isn't a box you tick once and forget about: it's fluid, personal, and way more interesting than most people realize. This sexuality quiz combines insights from sex researchers, Berlin's legendary queer scene, and real-world attraction patterns to help you explore your orientation with nuance and depth.

Before We Start: The Ground Rules

This sexual orientation test isn't here to slap a label on you and call it done. Think of it as a mirror for self-reflection, not a medical diagnosis. Your results might surprise you, confirm what you already know, or open up new questions entirely. All reactions are valid.

Answer honestly: this is private exploration, not a performance. And remember: you can be attracted to people without wanting to sleep with them, want to sleep with people you're not romantically drawn to, and change your mind about any of this as you grow. Sexuality is yours to define.

Section 1: The Attraction Spectrum

Question 1: When you're people-watching in a crowded place (think Berghain's garden or a busy café), who catches your eye first?

A) People whose gender matches what I'm "supposed" to be attracted to
B) Honestly? It's more about energy and vibe than gender
C) I find myself drawn to all kinds of people, regardless of gender
D) Specific gender expressions really do it for me, but not always the "traditional" ones
E) I rarely feel that spark with anyone, regardless of gender

Question 2: Your ideal fantasy scenario involves:

A) Someone of the gender I'm expected to be attracted to in a pretty conventional setup
B) The scenario matters more than the person's gender: it's about connection and chemistry
C) Multiple people of different genders, or scenarios that blur traditional boundaries
D) People who challenge gender norms or express themselves in unique ways
E) Emotional intimacy and connection matter way more than the physical stuff

Question 3: If you had to describe your "type," you'd say:

A) Pretty traditional for my orientation: I know what I like and it's consistent
B) It's complicated; I'm attracted to masculinity and femininity in different people
C) I don't really have a type based on gender: personality and chemistry rule everything
D) I'm drawn to people who don't fit neat categories, gender-wise or otherwise
E) Physical attraction is rare for me; I need emotional connection first

Section 2: Social Circles and Comfort Zones

Question 4: At a typical Berlin party you're most comfortable:

A) Sticking with people who share my general orientation and vibe
B) I can hang with anyone, but I gravitate toward open-minded crowds
C) The weirder and more diverse the crowd, the more at home I feel
D) I love spaces where people can express themselves without judgment
E) I prefer quieter gatherings where I can actually connect with people one-on-one

Question 5: When friends discuss their romantic lives, you:

A) Relate easily to stories that match my experience and orientation
B) Find yourself understanding different perspectives, even when they're not yours
C) Often share experiences that surprise people or challenge their assumptions
D) Feel like your attractions are more complex than most people's stories
E) Focus more on the emotional aspects than who they're sleeping with

Question 6: Your ideal relationship structure looks like:

A) With someone of the gender I'm typically attracted to
B) I'm open to different structures depending on the person and connection
C) I believe in multiple types of connections
D) I need partner(s) who understand that attraction and identity are complex
E) Deep, committed connection with one/ or more person: gender matters less than compatibility

Section 3: Self-Reflection and Identity

Question 7: When you think about coming out or discussing your sexuality:

A) It's straightforward: people generally get it without much explanation
B) I sometimes have to explain that attraction is more fluid than people think
C) I often find myself educating people about orientations they've never heard of
D) I wish there were better words for what I experience
E) I rarely feel the need to discuss my sexuality unless I'm in a relationship

Question 8: The word that best describes your approach to attraction:

A) Consistent: I know what I like and it doesn't change much
B) Flexible: I'm attracted to different things in different people
C) Expansive: gender isn't really a factor in my attractions
D) Evolving: how I understand my sexuality has shifted over time
E) Selective: I'm rarely attracted to anyone, but when I am, it's intense

Your Results: What Does It All Mean?

Mostly A's: Classic and Confident

You're likely straight, gay, or lesbian with a clear sense of your orientation. You know what you like, you're comfortable with it, and you don't feel the need to overthink it. There's beauty in that clarity: not everyone needs to have a complex relationship with their sexuality, and that's perfectly valid. Your attractions are consistent and align with traditional categories, which makes navigation easier in many social situations.

Mostly B's: The Thoughtful Explorer

You're probably heteroflexible, homoflexible, or somewhere on the bisexual spectrum. You experience attraction that doesn't always fit neat categories, and you're comfortable with that ambiguity. You might find yourself attracted to different qualities in different people, regardless of gender, or you might be primarily attracted to one gender with occasional exceptions. Berlin's scene would appreciate your nuanced approach to attraction.

Mostly C's: Beyond Boundaries

Welcome to pansexuality or broad bisexuality: you're attracted to people across the gender spectrum, and gender isn't a primary factor in your attractions. You likely believe that connection, chemistry, and individual uniqueness matter more than traditional categories. You probably feel most at home in queer spaces and diverse communities that celebrate all kinds of love and attraction.

Mostly D's: The Complexity Specialist

You might identify as queer, fluid, or be exploring newer identity terms that better capture your experience. Your attractions challenge traditional categories, and you're drawn to people who also exist outside conventional boundaries. You understand that sexuality can be fluid, contextual, and deeply personal. Labels feel useful but never quite complete for describing your reality.

Mostly E's: Connection-Centered

You're likely demisexual, asexual-spectrum, or gray-asexual. Physical attraction isn't your primary driver: you need emotional connection, deep compatibility, or specific circumstances to feel sexual attraction. This doesn't make your sexuality less valid or interesting; it just operates differently than the cultural norm. Many people share and understand this experience.

The Reality Check: Labels Are Tools, Not Boxes

Here's the thing about any sexuality quiz: your results are a starting point, not a destination. Maybe you scored mostly C's but feel more connected to pansexual identity than bisexual. Maybe you're mostly A's but questioning things lately. Maybe you got different results than expected and that's exactly what you needed to hear.

Sexuality researchers have developed frameworks like the Klein Sexual Orientation Grid precisely because attraction is multidimensional. Your romantic attractions, sexual behavior, fantasies, emotional preferences, and social connections might not all point in the same direction: and that's completely normal.

Berlin's legendary openness to sexual diversity didn't happen overnight. It grew from understanding that human sexuality is beautifully complex, that people change and grow, and that rigid categories often fail to capture lived experience. Whether you're exploring heteroflexible identity, questioning if you might be pansexual, or just trying to understand your attractions better, remember that exploration itself is valuable.

What Happens Next?

Your sexuality belongs to you. Whether this quiz confirmed what you already knew, opened up new questions, or completely surprised you, trust your own experience above any result. Some people find labels helpful for community and self-understanding; others prefer to focus on individual connections without categorical thinking.

If you want to explore further, Berlin offers incredible resources: from queer community centers to inclusive social spaces where you can meet people with diverse experiences. The city's sex-positive culture means you can ask questions, experiment safely, and change your mind without judgment.

Consider this quiz one data point in your ongoing relationship with yourself. Your sexuality might evolve, deepen, or shift focus as you grow. The goal isn't to find the perfect label and stick with it forever: it's to understand yourself better and connect more authentically with others.

Remember: there's no wrong way to be attracted to people, no timeline for figuring yourself out, and no requirement to explain your sexuality to anyone who doesn't deserve that intimacy. Whether you're straight, bisexual, gay, pansexual, queer, demisexual, or something else entirely, your experience is valid and your journey is your own.