Why More Men Are Exploring Their Bisexual Fantasies in Open Relationships
- Filip
- Aug 20
- 3 min read
The stereotype goes: if a straight man kisses another man, his whole sexual identity collapses like a cheap IKEA shelf. But lately—especially in open relationships—more men are discovering that sexuality can be fluid without requiring a total rebrand. The rise of bi-curious and heteroflexible labels is helping men ditch the “all or nothing” binary, and couples are reaping the benefits in and out of bed.
The Soft Launch of Male Bisexuality
Male bisexuality has always existed. What’s new is the language—and the safety—to explore it. Words like heteroflexible and bi-curious have given men space to experiment without feeling they need to make a lifetime declaration. It’s the sexual equivalent of trying on a leather harness before committing to the full dungeon membership.
Why Open Relationships Create Space
In monogamy, sexual curiosity can feel risky—like any deviation might unravel the whole relationship. In open or polyamorous setups, there’s already an understanding that attraction isn’t limited to one person or one gender. That freedom makes it easier for men to admit that yes, maybe they do want to know what it’s like to go down on a guy, or to be on the receiving end for once.
For many women in these relationships, a partner’s bisexuality isn’t a threat—it’s a turn-on. There’s compersion, novelty, and the thrill of seeing someone you love experience new pleasure.
Heteroflexible vs. Bisexual
Heteroflexible simply means “mostly straight, but open to same-sex encounters.” It’s a softer, more situational term than bisexual, which often assumes equal attraction across genders. Think of it like craft beer: you might have your go-to, but you’re not saying no to trying something seasonal if it looks interesting.
The Fantasy Factor
For some men, the curiosity is fueled by fantasy rather than a burning, persistent attraction. Watching gay porn. Reading erotic stories with male characters. Wondering what a threesome with another guy would feel like. In open relationships, these fantasies don’t have to stay hypothetical—they can be negotiated into reality with clear consent and boundaries.
Breaking the Masculinity Script
One of the biggest hurdles for men exploring bisexuality is cultural baggage. Centuries of toxic masculinity have tied male desirability to being aggressively straight. But younger generations—and a growing number of older couples—are dismantling that script. In a sex-positive, open relationship, “I want to try this with a guy” can be met with curiosity instead of panic.
Practical Tips for Couples Navigating This
Talk First, Not After – Discuss desires openly before acting. Nothing derails exploration faster than surprises in the wrong context.
Use Queer Spaces Respectfully – If you’re new, observe, listen, and don’t treat queer men as props for your fantasy.
Know Your Why – Is it about attraction, power play, curiosity? Being clear on your motivations helps set boundaries.
Debrief Together – Post-experience, check in on emotional impact—yours and your partner’s.
A More Honest Future
As open relationships and queer-friendly spaces become more normalised, male bisexuality is losing its taboo edge—and gaining a place in healthy, long-term intimacy. For some men, it’s a phase of exploration; for others, it’s a permanent expansion of who they are. Either way, the rules are loosening, and the pleasure potential is huge.
Because sometimes the most radical thing a man can do for his relationship is admit he doesn’t have all the answers about what turns him on—and then go find out, together.
