Being a Male Dom and Handling Multiple Submissives
- Filip
- May 7
- 2 min read
In the intricate world of BDSM, where trust and communication reign supreme, Quincy—better known as Q or Mr. Mind Fetish—stands out as a seasoned Dominant who has mastered the delicate balance of managing multiple submissives. In a candid conversation, Quincy shares insights into his journey, the dynamics of his relationships, and the nuances of being a Dom in a multi-submissive setup.

From Curiosity to Command
Quincy's foray into the BDSM realm wasn't a sudden plunge but a gradual exploration. He recalls, "I didn't wake up one day and decide to be a Dom. It was a journey of self-discovery, understanding my desires, and learning the responsibilities that come with this role." His initial experiences were rooted in curiosity, leading him to delve deeper into the psychological aspects of dominance and submission.
Building a Polyamorous Power Exchange
Living with his husband and two other submissives, Quincy emphasizes the importance of clear communication and consent. "It's not about collecting subs," he notes. "Each relationship is unique, built on mutual respect and understanding." He highlights that managing multiple submissives requires not just time but emotional intelligence, ensuring that each individual's needs and boundaries are respected.
The Mind Fetish Philosophy
For Quincy, dominance transcends physicality; it's a mental game. "The mind is the most potent erogenous zone," he asserts. His approach focuses on psychological stimulation, using anticipation, control, and mental challenges to deepen the connection with his submissives. This philosophy underscores the significance of trust and the power dynamics inherent in BDSM relationships.
Navigating Challenges and Celebrating Growth
Managing multiple submissives isn't without its challenges. Quincy acknowledges the complexities, stating, "Jealousy can arise, but open dialogue is key. We address concerns head-on, ensuring everyone feels valued." He also emphasizes the importance of continuous learning, attending workshops, and engaging with the BDSM community to refine his practices.
Advice for Aspiring Doms
Quincy offers sage advice for those considering the path of a Dominant: "Start with self-reflection. Understand your motivations and be prepared to invest time in learning. Consent, communication, and care are the pillars of any D/s relationship." He stresses that dominance isn't about control for control's sake but about guiding and nurturing growth within consensual boundaries.